Ok so this post is a much needed vent and so please understand that some of the things I say in this post are more out of feeling unable to understand everthing that happens in this life.
Our best friends the Miller's baby boy Urban Black was born December 16th, due to a cord being wrapped around his little neck he didn't live. I haven't been able to stop thinking about it since we got the news. Seeing Colby and Meghan just the night before and talking about how excited parenthood was going to be I can't help but ask the question WHY??? Why do they have to go through this, why do they have to suffer. As a friend and someone who hasn't gone through anything like this I couldn't help but want to blame someone, the doctor it had to be his fault, he had to be the reason that my friends were suffering. Then as I talked to Colby and Meg I realized that they didn't blame him, they understood more then I that this was an accident, something that potentially could happen to anyone but I could help but ask WHY THEM? I started to see that each time I visited them they were the strenght for everyone else. I realized how selfish I truly was, here my best friends just lost their precious angel and they were comforting me! Yes they were heart broken and yes they had their moments but for the most part they were the strong one's. And so again I asked WHY THEM, WHY did my friends who were such a strenght to those around them, why my friends who are such amazing people, so strong in the church and so giving why, why why! I am not going to lie, I don't know why I wish I did, I wish I knew what I could say to make the hurt go away, to make them know that everything is going to be ok but I don't. What I do know is that Colby and Meghan love their little boy more then anything in the world. And that whatever love they have for Urban Heavenly father has for them. I know that they will always be Urban's parents, I know that they will see him again, and that they will get to raise him just as they will their other children. I know that I don't understand Heavenly Father's plan for us or for Colby and Meg but I do trust that he has a plan. And that even though they are hurting, and truly no one on this earth understands what they are going through there is someone who does. Christ didn't just suffer on the cross, he suffered all things he is the only one who knows exactly what they are going through and WHY!
So I am here to tell you that I still don't know WHY, I wish more then anything I did but I probably never will. What I can tell you though is that I am so grateful for Colby and Meghan's example in my life. I seriously don't know what I would do without them and their friendship and I look forward to the day when they will get to be reunited with their sweet angel Urban Black. I love you both and please please know that we would do anything for you, if we could take it all away we would. Stay strong like I know you will, we love you!
10 comments:
Britt this is awful! I can't hardly believe that this has happened to them. I am so sad. We will keep them in our prayers for sure.
This breaks my heart. And I'm thinking the same as you, WHY? Why in 2009 did this happen? It's amazing that they are able to be so strong now, but at some point they may not be as strong and it's wonderful that they have great friends like you guys to be there for them. I can't stop thinking about them and I am praying for them. Like the scriptures say mourn with those that mourn and comfort those that need comfort. I hope my thoughts and prayers reach them.
Brittani your post is so profound..the things you say at the end really help me understand. (I also asked WHY when Jake told me the news). Life is so crazy. Our hearts go out to them....
Brit, I found out about baby Urban a couple hours after her appointment when Colby's dad told my mom. I have been so upset over this as well and can't imagine the pain that they are going through. My heart just breaks for them. I feel selfish saying that I haven't been able to sleep or find peace with this yet. If I feel this way I can't imagine what they are feeling. Why them? Why Urban? They deserved to take their baby home instead of bury him. Why them? My prayers everyday for them have been that they may find peace with this and to feel comforted. I with you, wish that I could do or say the perfect thing, but in a situation no words can express the sadness we feel. I know that you and Chris are good friends with Meg and Colby, and you should continue to be there for them. It will take a long time for their hearts to mend as well as ours. The only comfort that I have is knowing that Heavenly Father has a plan for all of us and that they will be able to be with their sweet baby again. Take care, Nat
I can't stop thinking about it either. I cannot even imagine how horrible that would be. Amazing they are so strong. I'm sure they are very grateful for you. I think anyone is asking the question "why?" It's very hard not to, and you care so much about them...just wanting to understand it all.
We'll continue to keep them in our prayers.
I am SO sad for them. There can't possibly be anything worse than losing a child. I don't understand why either. What a horrible thing.
Oh my...how sad!! being 8 weeks away from being due my self this brought tears to my eyes. I feel so terrible for them. Heavenly Father must have had bigger plans for him in heaven!! I hope them the best and pray that they will be comforted.
this is so devastating. my heart is aching for them. please let them know that they are in my thoughts and prayers.
This makes me so sad! I can't even imagine what they are going through. They are lucky to have such great friends like you. I'm with you WHY? Why do things happen like this to such good people.
I feel the same way. I was so upset about it and didn't understand and then I went and visited Meg the other day. And she made me feel better. Why is that? How is she so strong? I don't get it. Oh, you did great at the funeral. And, Chris' talk was PERFECT. I loved the letter from Urban. It was the sweetest thing ever. I hope you gave them a copy of his talk. They will want that!
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